21화 : 자네…… 왜 우는 겐가?강경시험이 하루 앞으로 바싹

21화 : 자네…… 왜 우는 겐가?
강경시험이 하루 앞으로 바싹 다가왔다.
시험공부에 매진해도 시간이 부족할 상황이었건만.
“전하.......”
박숙의의 울음소리를 뒤로 한 채 라온은 숙의전을 나섰다. 희정당으로 향하는 라온의 걸음은 무거울 수밖에 없었다.
벌써 이틀 째, 희정당과 집복헌을 오가는 일을 반복하고 있던 터였다.
그러나 아무런 수확 없이 헛발품만 팔고있자니, 대체 이게 뭐하는 짓인가 하는 생각 도 들었다.
그리고 이쯤 하였으면 그만 지칠 만도 하시건만.
숙의마마께서는 지치지 않고 주상전하께서한을 보내고 있었다.
숙의마마의 서한에 대한 주상전하의 답신 역시 여전히 백지였다.
백지를 보내시는 주상전하의 마음일랑은 대체 어떤 것일까?
터덜터덜, 힘없이 걸음을 옮기던 라온은 희정당의 긴 담벼락 그늘에 쪼그리고 앉았다.
서늘한 가을바람이 귀밑 자분치를 흔들었다.
“어느새 바람이 이리 차가워졌네.”
긴 한숨과 함께 혼잣말을 중얼거리던 라온 은 담벼락에 등을 기댄 채 눈을 감았다.
가을볕에 온 몸이 느는해졌다.
볼을 어루만지는 나른한 온기에 절로 졸음이 쏟아진다.
감은 눈 속엔 울고 있는 숙의마마의 잔영이 어른거렸다.
그 잔영 위로 귤빛 소화꽃이 겹쳐 보였다.
단 하룻밤 임금의 승은을 입고 다시는 찾지 않는 님을 기다리다 죽어버린 궁녀처럼, 숙의마마께서도 그리 버림받은 것일까?
유한한 삶속에 사랑이란, 사람의 인연이란 , 어쩌면 실낱같이 허망한 것이리라. 그러나 그 허망한 것에 목숨을 걸고, 눈물을 흘리는 것이 여인이고, 사람이었다.
라온은 착잡한 마음에 쉽게 눈을 뜰 수가없었다.
울고 있는 숙의마마를 떠올리면 다시 몸을 움직여 주상전하가 계시는 희 정당으로 가야하지만, 가봐야 백지로 된 답신을 받을 것이 뻔하니.
‘어찌해야할까?’
집복헌의 무거운 분위기가 라온의 가슴을 억눌렀다.
왜 내관들이 하나같이 이 일을 하지 않으려 하는지 이해할 수 있었다.
힘들여 서신을 보내봤자 돌아오는 것은 빈백지이니.
부질없는 일을 하는 것 같은 생각이 들었다.
“하아.”
긴 한숨이 절로 나왔다.
바로 그때였다.
톡톡톡.
작은 새의 부리처럼 연약한 무언가가 라온의 어깨를 두드렸다.
“누구……?”
놀란 라온은 서둘러 눈을 떴다.
이윽고 그녀의 눈앞에 작고 조그마한 얼굴이 다가왔다.
조막만한 얼굴에 눈, 코, 입이 올망졸망 모여 있는 저 얼굴. 누구를 많이 닮았는데?
생각을 하며 라온은 흐릿한 눈을 서둘러 손등으로 비볐다.
그런 라온을 빤히 들여다보던 소녀가 불현 듯 라온의 손목을 잡아당겼다.
“왜?”
소녀의 느닷없는 행동에 라온은 의문을 터트렸다.
그러나 이내 소녀가 왜 그런 행동을 했는지 이해가 되었다.
‘여기서 뭐하는 것인가?’
작은 고사리 손이 라온의 손바닥에 글씨를 쓰기 시작했다.
말을 못 하는 건가?
고개를 외로 기울이는 라온의 손바닥에 소녀가 연달아 무언가를 썼다.
‘어마마마의 서한을 전하러 희정당에 가는 길이 아닌가? 예서 이러고 있으면 어마마마 의 서한은 언제 전하겠는가?’
어마마마의 서한?
잠시 머릿속에 물음표가 떠올랐다.
그러나 이내, 라온의 얼굴이 경직되었다.
올망졸망 모여 있는 저 이목구비.
수줍은 미소.
저 어린 소녀의 얼굴은 숙의 박씨를 그대로 빼다 박았다.
그러고 보니 숙의 박씨에게 열 살 남짓한 어린 딸이 하나 있다는 소리를 들었었는데.
숙의마마께서 낳으신 옹주께서는 어쩐 일인지 어릴 때부터 말이 어눌하여 좀처럼 전각 밖으로 나오지 않는다고 환관들끼리 속 달거리는 소리를 들은 적이 있었다.
그렇다면.......!
“옹주마마 이 시옵니까?”
라온은튕겨지듯 자리에서 벌떡 일어섰다.
라온의 갑작스런 행동에 영온옹주가 놀란 듯 뒤로 한 걸음 물러섰다.
그제야 자신이 무슨 행동을 했는지 깨달은 라온이 미안한 웃음을 얼굴에 떠올렸다.
“송구 하옵니다, 옹주마마. 너무 놀라서 ……”
서둘러 고개를 조아리는 라온을 보며 어린 옹주가 웃었다.
그러나 그 웃음이라는 것이 너무 여리고 힘이 없어, 금방이라도 사라질 듯 불안하기 그지없었다.
라온에게 영온옹주가 다시 손 글씨를 썼다.
‘어마마마께서 전하의 답신을 기다리고 있어’
“옹주마마.”
‘가서 주상전하께 어마마마의 서한을 전해 주게나.’
“하오나… ….”
‘나도 알고 있네. 똑같은 답신을 받을 것이 라는 것을.’
‘......’

結果 (英文) 1:

21: you are ... Why Wu Gen?Tough test this day forward closely approached.Even if you lack the time, circumstances testing study is sold out.“전하.......”Sook's cries and came back to the former camp in La while. Heading into the fair, la pace is of white came to be.Already the second day, parties and home and donate to the comings and goings, the abdomen were.However, there is no harvest and huts without foot only selling Johnny, the hell are doing is thinking of also heard.And so, if you're the dreaded stop alone.Lady's Mama has not had to spend one week in which devolution.Lady's Mama's letter for devolution was a response of either still blank.White paper sent to the heart of ylang ylang is the devolution of the week what?-Less-less, stepped backed la without power on in the shadow of a long wall of political parties the white squat sat.The cool autumn breeze shook the parotid party minutes value."I ended up having a cool breeze to come here."With a long sigh and murmur was talking to La on the wall to the recumbent bonds eyes.The fall came on the body that is sunlit.Caressed the ball touches a languid double in sleepy warmth of down.Imprisonment eyes cry of Mama's blurred the yen for adults.He seemed to be superimposed over blurred Tangerine light digestive flowers.Wearing a King's only overnight w/wait again does not find the Lord died, like a lady's maid Mama after so forlorn?Iran, who love bond in a finite number of lives in Iran, maybe a bunch like heomanghan would be the room. However, he would be risking his life in heomanghan, tearing the woman, and it was a person.Easy on the eyes in unison in La on cagjab have not been able to open.Crying ladies, we again move your body week Mama of devolution is to go to a political party, but a white blank will be close to get a response.' Why? 'Home clothing donation came a heavy atmosphere of La's chest.Why does my cribs, this one could understand what you're trying not to do this.It's hard to send your correspondence you will get back an empty white paper.Wishful thinking to do the same."Oh."A long sigh came out of this section.Right then and there.Pop pop.Like a little bird's beak, go on the shoulder, something soft beat."Who ...?"Nolan la awakening in a hurry on.Soon she approached a small little faces in front of.Joe just might come face to face with eyes, nose, and mouth creamed in the face that ruined the pawns. An awful lot of whom?Thoughts and hurry up the bleary-eyed hand etc all non-move.I remember one girl stared at such temperature look fire seemed to come from the County's wrists tugging in La."Why not?"Come on girl's haseon behavior from its doors.However, you have to understand why such behaviour within the girl.' What are you doing here? 'Small Fern in the Palm of your hands all began writing the fine print.Speechless?In addition to tipping and came back in La in the Palm of girls wrote something.' Do come to one of the former White Mama just goes on length? For example, if you get a zillion in Mama's letter when I? 'Irma Mama's letter?For a while, came up with a question mark on the head.However, in the face of stiff, the L.A. within the whole.Falls falls in an upset come me visage.A shy smile.That is the face of a young girl of Pak as deflate.Which reminds me-sook Pak over 10-year-old youngest daughter to the one heard that.Sook gave birth to ONG in Lord Mama was when I was a child, was hit hard by a horse from the em does not come out the sound of the streets themselves eunuchs express had never heard of.Then .......!"Ong province at Mama?"La temperature seemed to have stood up up bounces.All of a sudden came the spirit in action seemed to take a step back and retaining the Lord Nolan back.Now that I've realized yourself what behavior came face to face with a smile in La I'm sorry to say."Come, Lord, to Auld Lang Syne Mama. So surprised that ... "Hurry up and come along young kowtow, retaining the Lord laughed.However, he would laugh too, even Jericho seemed to disappear, there's power to be had that anxiety.La came back to hand the whole spirit, retaining the stock price.' Irma Mama after reportedly waiting for a reply of '"Ong province Mama."' Go to the main devolution zillion Mama tell a letter of God will give me. '"Oh my ...".' I know. The same will be the response. '‘......’

結果 (英文) 2:

Tue 21? ...... Why you crying genga
. The tougher test came a day ahead closely
. Yieotgeonman be sold in exam situations lacking two hours
"charge ......."
one cries Raon back of baksuk is a deliberative ventured before. The pace of Raon towards the huijeongdang was forced heavier.
Already in two days, it was from that and repeat the Sun and from the huijeongdang and jipbok old.
But itjani but in vain balpum sell no harvest, fell even think of applying the hell am I doing.
And at this point Once you have there.But you like Mando tired enough.
Changshu Mama he was spending the Lord columnar charge tirelessly.
reply pillar charges for letters of deliberative Mama was also still blank.
does any a blank bonaesineun heart of the columnar charge ilrangeun alternative?
teodeol teodeol , Raon omgideon pace helplessly sat squat on the long wall the shadow of huijeongdang.
cool autumn wind shook gwimit jabunchi.
"Suddenly the wind jyeotne come cold."
murmured the street talking to himself with a sigh Dunn Raon has such a wall and closed his eyes while recumbent.
this whole body to fall sunburn became entails.
this section sleepiness sleepy warmth pour touched, stroked the ball home.
soken closed eyes stumbled the relics of deliberative Mama adults crying.
that ghosting superimposed over gyulbit digestion flowers looked.
like you've just wearing w maid of honor of the night waiting for the king's death does not find again, deliberation mom who does go ahead so abandoned?
in a finite life, love, ties Iranian people, maybe it will, as vain slightest. But the vain risked his life to, and that she shed tears, was a man.
Raon could not easily open your eyes to chakjaphan heart
cry if recalling the deliberations Mama again moved the body to go to the Jubilee party who is columnar charge but , go ppeonhani to receive a reply to a blank check.
"What should I do? '
jipbok heonui heavy atmosphere and releasing the chest of Raon billion.
Why could understand that the inner tube they do not want to do this as one.
bother returning bwatja send a letter What am empty white paper coming.
I thought like that vain one.
"ha,"
came the section long sigh
was then.
toktoktok.
the frail something like a small bird beak tapped on the shoulder and Raon.
"Who ... ...? "
Nolan Raon hurry opened his eyes.
Soon this small little face in front of her came.
that face, that face, eyes, nose and mouth to gather enough olmangjolmang film formation. I look like someone a lot?
Thinking and Raon is rubbed into the back of the hand as soon as possible a blurry eyes
seemed to have bulhyeon girl bodeon into such Raon staring pulled the wrist of Raon.
"Why?"
Raon has questioned the girls do not suddenly act the burst.
However, within the girl was to understand why such behavior.
'What are you doing here? "
little fern hands began writing letters in the palm of Raon.
did you not speak?
pay out of his head in the palm of Raon girl wrote something in a row.
is not preach the length of the letter, go to huijeongdang 'eomamama? If yeseo doing this would Letters of eomamama When before? '
Letter of eomamama?
Flashed the question for a moment my mind.
But usually, the face of Raon became rigid.
That Visage gathered olmangjolmang.
Shy smile
face of that young girl's deliberations Park atda literally night and deflate the.
come to think of it eotneunde heard that one a deliberative Park Ten year a little more than a young daughter
deliberative Mama had begotten God ongju he since somehow a kid saying to eonul does not come out rare engravings eunuchs among themselves in dalgeori is the sound had been.
So .......!
"ongju Mama when do I do?"
Raon stood bounced jideut jumped up on the spot.
stood youngon ongju seemed surprised at the sudden action of Raon stepped back a pace.
KJV he recalled the Raon is apologetic smile realize what you act in the face.
"Auld ke, ongju mom. Too surprised ...... "
laughed a young hurry ongju watching joahrineun Raon his head.
But he would not have the force of Jericho laughs too, huh did not seem anxious to disappear any moment.
Wrote to the Raon youngon ongju handwriting again.
" Eomamama he's waiting for the verdict of the charges,
"ongju Mama,"
'go and give her a letter of eomamama pillar to charge me.'
"haohna ..."
"I know I do. That the reply would be the same. '
' ...... '